I can't keep writing about this, it's killing me yet, there just isn't much I can do about it. How do you tell your brain not to think, how do you tell your heart not to feel, how do you tell you fingers not to type? How do you go on, knowing you once had everything at your fingertips and you let it slip away? I need saving, this is not me, yet if not.. who the fuck is it? Nothing else mattered during that time and now, nothing matters at all. Let it rain I'm told, but I don't feel cleansed at all, I feel..... done.